A rant of annoyance.

Lately (ok not so lately, it’s just that I have recently grown exceedingly irked by this.) There’s been a particular increase in the marketing of a health powder. Ok, I don’t know what to call it because it’s not just one of those supplements that you take once a day to help bowel movement or stuff like that…noooooo. This particular “health” powder is like a food replacement, at least that’s the way they advertise it. Maybe to those short sighted idiots it’s a great deal. Buy this magical powder and never depend on normal food ever again. Just mix according to your taste. Make variety. Add bananas, add pineapples, add fish, or go crazy and add a couple of rocks. The point is, the way that this one particular person is promoting this powder, it’s as though she entirely depending on it. In fact, she condemns those who still consume “conventional” food.

Seriously! Day in day out I see her posts about all the shakes she’s consuming and how much it makes her “tummy feel happy”, at times I can count more than three shakes. Does she even take any natural, God-given, fresh food? Don’t get me wrong, I’m no health Goddess who eats all the veggies I’m supposed to, nor am I one of those homey-dads who eats only a good hearty home-cooked meal. I have my fair share of store-bought and processed food, but the was she’s presenting herself, it’s as though less than 10% of her food intake is of “normal” food. The rest is her and her shakes.

I know you’re a salesperson, and you want to convince your customers that you’re endorsing the best product ever. Hell lady, I’ve been a salesperson myself. I know all your tricks and tactics. Perhaps that’s why I see through them so easily and it is also perhaps why I am so disgusted by how you are presenting yourself, how you are presenting your life.

Look here lady, anything you choose to take, should be taken in moderation. When you place your greatest faith in some chemical blend of unknown origin and consume that and only that, don’t you think there’s something wrong with your judgement? Maybe you don’t think very far, but every time you post your latest status about your fourth shake of the day, all I can think of is the human race stuck on the ship in outer space. You know? The chair-ridden fat people in Wall-E slurping hamburger-flavoured shakes because they “are so advanced, that they are beyond ole time normal food”

Is our society so jaded to believe that we are a lesser species if we consume fresh natural foods? Instead we should consume (I use here the word ‘consume’, not ‘eat’ because obviously you wouldn’t ‘eat’ the powder. Even the crazed shakers would admit that’s just disgusting.) these tried and tested health drinks that will conjure up limitless health and energy.

You annoying person, now you make me want to go and grill a chicken or something.