Snakes in a plane

 
    So after my much needed vacay, I came back to the office to see my admin staff usher in a wildlife guy and bring him to the back. Wait….wildlife guy? What's he doing here? Apparently, on Monday when one of the male workers opened the back door, he found a nest of baby cobras. He put them into a box and threw it away, and afterwards the admin girl called the wildlife people and asked what they should do, and they said they'd come for a consult.

 
Wait, let's rewind for a bit.

he found a nest of baby cobras

a nest of baby cobras

a nest of baby cobras

baby cobras

cobras.

Now, a bit of informative reflection:

 
Pay close attention to what it says about the mother. She stays with the eggs. Guards the mounds tenaciously. Venom is as potent as that of the adults.

 
Ok, now let the panic set in.

 

 

 
Helllllll…….we park our cars right by that door. There was a cobra's nest there all along???

 
When I was younger, a king cobra made its way into my house, and I was alone at the time (save for my fat uncle-cat and a recent mommy cat and her litter of three). I couldn't figure out why the mother cat was hissing at this corner and (thankfully) I didn't rummage through the mess she was hissing at. I feel faint just thinking of how that might've transpired.
Anyhow, when I had safely moved to my bedroom, after hours of sitting about a meter away from where the creature was dozing under a pile of fallen junk mail, the mother cat decided to attack. I heard a commotion and opened my bedroom door and saw the mother cat fighting a snake. I didn't think it would be a cobra. A king cobra. But I knew from its size it was probably dangerous. So I closed the door. I breathed in, opened the door again, hunted throughout the house for the three baby cats and scooped them up. Scooped up the hefty uncle-cat, hunted for the mother who was all bristles and claws; but no, my arms were full. Uncle-cat likes his fish a bit much. Deposited kittens and hefty uncle-cat into my bedroom, opened the door AGAIN, and exited my room, careful not to let out any of the felines in my room, hunted for the mother cat, scooped up mother cat, put her into my room, exited the bedroom AGAIN to go to the room next to mine where the home phone was (at the time I was not even in my pre-teens yet and the 2^nd millennia had not started. Cellphones were a luxury selected people had. My father had one.) and frantically dialed my father's number. The phone rang in his bedroom. He had left the phone at home.

 
So there's a snake loose in my house, a room full of various aged felines safely tucked away, and I had to wait at least another hour for my parents to return from work. Where do I choose to wait for them? Perched on the sofa a meter and a half from where I saw mother cat tussling with the snake. Genius. I'll spare you the details of how the creature was finally caught. But the snake guy said pretty much the same thing the wildlife guy said. We were lucky we didn't encounter the mother king cobra. They are daaaaayyyyyuuuuuuummmmmmmm fierce. The one found in my house was an adolescent male, and was more prone to hiding away rather than confrontation. How it managed to slither into the house, we still do not know to this day.

 
Back to our current day excitement, the wildlife guy that came said that behind our office is apparently their natural habitat. And chances are there are scores of families living in the small wilderness behind us. I probably sound like I live in a remote village where chickens roam free and children don't wear shoes when they play outside. May I assure you, the only chickens you will find here, are ceramic decorative ones, or the unfeathered carcasses you keep in your freezer.

 
My colleagues started panicking, refusing to go to the pantry (nearest to the back door where the babies were found), asking for a state of emergency to be declared, regretting all those times they parked their car in the alley near the "wilderness".

 
Me? I'm sitting here eating a vanilla cream bun.